DLand - Brought to You by the Letters F .. E ... H

Welcome to GenieAlisa's page. The word for the day is "feh". I'm not sure if there is a better word. What do you say when you're angry and lonely and sad and confused and hurt and disappointed and mad as hell and not going to take it anymore (not necessarily in that order or even about the same topic)? Hmm. I guess, I just sigh and say "feh." I suppose a mundane update is in order. Woke up and looked at the clock. It said 10:00 on the dot. I realized that meant it was actually 11:00. I also realized that I had slept for a good 11 hours. Go me. About five minutes after that, my cell phone gave it's distinctive pidgeon ring saying that Jeremy was checking in on me. I dragged my butt out of bed and he came over about 30 minutes later. We attempted to go kite flying but the wind didn't cooperate. He left for a meeting with his car dudes and I headed home to putter. Sarah and I took a shower together and her coat is looking a lot better for it. My "coat" is looking moderately okay because of it.

Went out and bought some music. Pink, Jimmy Eat World, Mavericks, George Carlin and Chris Isaak to be specific. Headed back to the house to do the taxes. We owed some on federal but had a small refund for state taxes. Talked to Daddy for a bit (he was fixing the siding on the house). Went to office to pick up some papers. Stopped at 7-11 for ... you know ... stuff ... Headed back to the apartment to putter. Painted my toes and fingernails (Revlon calls the color "Love Her Madly", but I would just call it dark red). Yep. Got a lot done today.

Talked on the phone for hours with various folks. All in all not so bad of a day. But still just feeling blah. I'm always the girl with a plan. And when I don't necessarily have a plan or all the answers, life starts to get kinda crazy for me. Gah.

But I'm still hanging in there. There's still a spark in me.

DLand - My Hot Date

I went on a date last night. Jeremy and I didn't really discuss whether seeing other people during the separation would be okay but he didn't seem to mind when I told him about it today. It wasn't much of a date since we didn't go out. I just drove over to his place and we watched movies and cuddled on the couch. We talked about songs he likes and he seemed really interested in my insulin pump and belly ring. We seem to have a lot of common interests too. There was even a tickle fight! He's shorter than me, which is something I don't find that attractive in men, but he's really athletic - a wrestler, and basketball player and hockey fan. And I don't normally go out with younger men, but he was really mature for his age.

We had to cut the date short at around 9 as he had to go to bed (he gets up early). But I did get a goodnight kiss (*giggle*). I really like this guy and hope I can see him again soon. We'll see if his Mom and Dad will let us have a second date soon.

DLand - I Betcha They Won't Play This Entry on the Radio ...

I have a horrible vocabulary of incredibly vulgar terms which I use with great frequency. I became aware of it the more time I spend around clients, children and my parents. I catch myself wanting to use some terminology that really would make a sailor blush. I pay more attention to radio deejays trying to come up with suitable substitutions for my current explitives. But, damn, those sound dumb. I've been saying "stuff" a lot and "whatever" instead of "all this shit" and "fuckin' A". It's really all a matter of what you're used to. They say that someone who curses just doesn't have good vocabulary. They don't know what insipid means so they just say dumbass. They can't say lascivious (let alone spell it) so they just say how fucking hot someone looks. But it's not like you can look up "feh" or "well, fuck me" in dictionary.com and get an entry for ennui or malcontent. So I have to work hard to build a good vocabulary of curse word replacements. Maybe they should actually teach a class on that in the military.

My father hates it when women use the word "shit." He thinks it's just a abhoration to modern society. They may as well just be flashing their asses on the street if they are going to lower themselves to such vulgarity. But it's just that word that gets him all worked up. And I seem to use it like a comma.

These taboo words have become common place, I suppose. But I take great pride now in being able to convey the same level of disgust or displeasure or excitement with words that all could be used on television or radio. I'll let you know how it goes. But I hit my head on the car door this afternoon and based on came out of my mouth, I don't think I'll be singing in the church choir anytime soon.

In other news, Bossman is off to Atlantic City this afternoon. It should be a good evening. They called to make reservations and the front desk actually forwarded his call to his personal host at her house. That is service for you. He is a very "valued customer", it would seem. Also, the Venetian in Vegas has slackened the requirements for accruing points there. This means I reeeeeeeeally need to go there and get me some more credits. I need to stay there for $99 for two nights. I need to throw money in the street. Need it. Perhaps a company "retreat" is in order soon. Ah, yes. I feel the pull of the sandy deserts of Nevada.